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INSIDE: And forget the Present, because I didn’t get you one. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: Please, do not attempt to blow out the candle.
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INSIDE: Smashing your finger in a car door is nice too. Cracking your tooth is fun. And you can't beat twisting your ankle for a...
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INSIDE: You know you’re getting older when your stalker has a walker. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: But be sure to take a snack and maybe some water, because that's one long-ass lane. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: Come to find out, it was a hat. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: This card would make a lot more sense if your name were Bert.
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INSIDE: Of course, that guy was waaay younger than you. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: I didn’t know what the hell they were talking about. So I got you this card. Happy Birthday
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INSIDE: Actually, I have no idea what you did last year. Anyways, Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: …"Girls night out" didn't mean walking around the house without a bra? Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: When you’re done celebrating, please come visit me in the mental ward.
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INSIDE: …but I don’t think they meant farts. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: Except that one you keep having where you're walking around naked at your old high school. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: ...you must not have the faintest clue as to what's happening to you!
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INSIDE: I'm sure you can find a date somewhere else. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: ...unless of course, you're a man. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: ...you don't have to worry about dying young! Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: Start hanging around old fat people. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: But you already have one of those. Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: ...your grip on reality, that is! Happy Birthday!
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INSIDE: The world could use a good laugh these days! Happy Birthday
