Birthday Cards

On your birthday, take it easy.

INSIDE: But not slutty easy, just relaxed.

BD189 / $2.75

This birthday, take a walk down memory lane

INSIDE: But be sure to take a snack and maybe some water, because that's one long-ass lane. Happy Birthday!

BD190 / $2.75

You've still got it.

INSIDE: Now if you could only remember where you put it. Happy Birthday!

BD183 / $2.75

YOUR MAMA DID NOT RAISE A FOOL!

INSIDE: Your dad had a hand in it, too. Happy Birthday!

BD172 / $2.75

To Stay Young Remember…

INSIDE: ...whole foods are good for you. Happy Birthday!

BD142 / $2.75

Old age is only in the mind...

INSIDE: ...of all the people at your birthday party!  Happy Birthday!

BD187 / $2.75

Diagram of Your Brain

INSIDE: ...Yep. You're old. Happy Birthday!

BD185 / $2.75

Don't look now…

INSIDE: But those old people over there are younger than us! Happy Birthday!

BD169 / $2.75

If you're feeling positive and upbeat on your Birthday...

INSIDE: ...you must not have the faintest clue as to what's happening to you!

BD154 / $2.75

For your birthday, I have combined your two favorite pastimes.

INSIDE: The remote now flushes the toilet. Happy Birthday!

BD126 / $2.75

Have A Green Birthday

INSIDE: You can hug a tree, but going any further is inappropriate.

BD186 / $2.75

You're not old until…

INSIDE: …you need a sports bra to brush your teeth. Happy Birthday!

BD127 / $2.75

You think you're middle aged?

INSIDE: You know a lot of people in their hundreds? Happy Birthday!

BD181 / $2.75

Another birthday, another candle…

INSIDE: …another old broad, too hot to handle! Happy Birthday!

BD137 / $2.75

Happy Birthday! At your age, you're probably still enjoying golf, tennis, skiing…

INSIDE: ...and whatever else is on TV.

BD161 / $2.75

Growing older is just like riding a bicycle

INSIDE: ...off a cliff. Happy Birthday!

BD174 / $2.75

INSIDE: You're never too old to chase after your dreams! Happy Birthday

BD144 / $2.75

INSIDE: And you thought shrinking with age meant your height! Happy Birthday!

BD140 / $2.75

Happy Birthday To You, Did You Get My Present?

INSIDE: That's OK, my birthday isn't for a while yet.

BD179 / $2.75

Your Birthday?

INSIDE: Or just drunk. Hope it's happy!

BD128 / $2.75

Happy Birthday

INSIDE: Don't worry, you'll never lose your style!

BD023 / $2.75

They say that the greatest gifts come from within...

INSIDE: ...but I don't think they meant farts! Happy Birthday!

BD173 / $2.75

Image of guy walking

INSIDE: Sex isn't all I think about! Happy Birthday

BD184 / $2.75

Focus on the good things in your life rather than the bad.

INSIDE: It's a whole lot less time consuming! Happy Birthday!

BD180 / $2.75

INSIDE: Happy Birthday to you and Stupid!

BD188 / $2.75

It is one of life's great truths that wisdom comes with age…

INSIDE: ...unless of course, you're a man. Happy Birthday!

BD109 / $2.75